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2·1 year agoGoogle for polyphasic sleep. By fucking with your own sleep schedule you can reduce the number of hours you sleep while still getting the same restful effect. There’s a few different schedules, some work better than others. The concept does work though, I’ve done it.
Nah, I say that’s part of the superpower. After using it a bunch, the weilder will have little or no more cognitive dissonance of their own. Every time they use it will further purify their own thought process. That’s like a superpower where every time you use it it replaces a little bit of your body fat with muscle. After you use it a bunch, you end up ripped.
First- understand that everyone goes through this, everybody has an answer for you, but the answer that worked for them may not work for you. There’s no right or wrong answer. A lot of people say ‘the way to get over someone is to get under someone’ personally I’ve never subscribed to that sort of thinking. It leads to unhealthy rebound relationships IMHO.
The only thing that will really fix this is time. So there is no magic bullet. There are things you can do to help though or pass the time faster. The biggest one is find ways to not ruminate. Focus your attention on other things, ideally useful things. Take some time to improve yourself in fun ways. Hit the gym is an obvious one, but I generally recommend take up a hobby or learn an instrument or take a class. Basically learn some fun new skill and focus your attention on that. It serves as a distraction from your grief, but also a source of engagement and a little happiness.
It WILL get better.
NTA.
I say she’s in the wrong because if you and her are together, and she decides she doesn’t want to be together anymore, she owes you a clear message explaining that.
She said she never brought that up because she knew it would hurt me, so apparently I was thinking she’s in a relationship with me for all that while.
Okay, she wanted to avoid a difficult conversation, but you were owed that. Without that, she just kept leading you on, giving you the impression that you were together when you were not. That is wasting your time and emotion and I do qualify that as cheating- she was still keeping you under the impression that you and her were together, therefore the fact that she checked out is irrelevant. She owed you a breakup.
You sound like a very kind person who is extremely accommodating, and she sounds like she has a lot of issues but still cares about you a lot and is pretty confused.
If you want to continue a friendship/relationship with her, I suggest making joker a promise that you will always be honest with each other.
I would also be asking how much the other guy knows about you. If she has gone from avoiding difficult conversations with you, to avoiding difficult conversations with him, that’s not cool.
Good bot